Be There for Yourself

Last month I was in training with motivational speaker Les Brown and one of the facilitators, Dr. Julie VanPutten, asked me a question that triggered my desire to share with audiences and clients how important it is to be there for yourself. Dr. Van Putten asked her question from the space of knowing that I had dealt with the issue of abandonment since I was a child. She asked me to share with the audience what they could do if they were facing issues related to abandonment. Maybe they were going through a divorce, or feeling alone, or not supported by their families or at work. 

As soon as I heard her question, the first thought that came to my mind was, “you have to be there for yourself first." I explained that we cannot wait for anyone to fill that empty void and instead we have to find ways to support and love ourselves. I shared that you cannot really give of what you don’t have and for me it had been a journey of learning how to love myself, how to have self-compassion. I had to learn how to be there for myself first and not to wait for someone else to do it for me. 

I also shared how, for many years, I played victim waiting for those around me to give me the sense of belonging, and the feeling of being supported that I was missing. I was looking for the answers outside of me and I did not understand that I was the one who needed to change from the inside out. I did not know that the answers had been inside of me all of these years. This is when I understood the phrase "the answer is within". Now I play “victor”, instead of “victim”. I am free. 

I invite you to consciously be there for yourself by having: 

Self-Compassion. Practice seeing the good aspects of yourself. Look within; don’t abandon yourself. 

Self-Forgiveness. Be willing to forgive yourself and to let go of blame, shame, guilt and fear. Practice humility. 

Self-Love. Let go of any negative programming, wrong beliefs and ideas about yourself. Make a new agreement to love yourself and to claim your divine truth. 

I invite you to always be there for yourself by embracing the extraordinary person that you are with love and compassion. Remember, there is greatness within you!

Affirm: I support myself unconditionally with love and compassion

Gloria Ramirez

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